November Reign

NOVEMBER RAIN REIGN
Real Talk: The November rain is a tad depressing, a tad demotivating and a lot nostalgia inspiring. It might make you want to cocoon into a cuddle coma or dwell in disaster over: matters of the past or pending present. It may make you want to do nothing and go no where. It may inspire you to relish in the company of your self. The cold, the rain, the winter blues are all capable of declining spirits, especially for singles. Who let's face it, are a lot like scrambled eggs at the end of the night (at any event serving potential pussy or dick). People aren't necessarily "slutty" but lonely and using sex and snuggles to fill a void, which is likely not ready to be filled properly by a love mate. This void will drive people to do a number of things : sleep with people they shouldn't, booty call or flirt with people they already claim to be over, take home someone they shouldn't or take advantage of a person who you know likes you a lot (you just don't truly feel the same way.) The November rain will bring out acts of uncertainty, loneliness and desperation so you  must reign- reign-reign-reign against this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uX9yNuUkLKU - "Reign" -UNKLE

At the end of the day, no matter how much you want anyone willing to share an umbrella (or anyone worth throwing your umbrella away for so you can embrace dramatically in the rain) - these things cannot be forced. Your disposition will affect your dating luck so try to figure out how to be happy with yourself first because this outlook will attract a lot more rainy day suitors.

Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18): An't No Sunshine ~ Jackson Five
Your Most Likeable Trait:FRIENDLINESS
What's going on with you? Your a bit more evil or emo or something unlike yourself in this rain. You're incomplete. Something needs to be sorted, and you may not even be aware of it. You also might want to look at the bigger picture of things. Sometimes you seem to see things your way without empathy for the opposition. Your not always right, but the moment someone says something you don't like you will just walk away.  You have to trace your steps and see who they might be hurting.Stop seeking perfection in things because you really do -do that sometimes you know?
A part of you will feel the need to challenge the rain, by running in it or still making time for leisure. You are not willing to minimize your level of adventure, even if the rain does bring out the mean in you. Walk on eggshells if you are dealing with a mean faced, rain inspired Aquarius.

Pisces (Feb 19-March 20): I like the Rain The Most When it Stops ~ Joe Pur
 Your Most Likable Trait: COMPASSION
You have to stop being so hard on yourself because people really value your level of compassion. Compassion is rare, especially during the rainy season because people are so consumed with their own misery and work deadlines. Pretty soon your friends are going to make you get "I"M NOT SORRY" tattooed on your arm for constant reminder because they are sick of telling you over and over. You have to learn how to focus and harness your gifts. You are talented but you need to stop taking the easy way out. Yes, you've been lucky with things always working out in the end, but one day that might not always be the case. You just might get hit by a car in your careless pursuits of running across the street, or maybe worse. Move with caution not with impulse.

Sagittarius: (November 22-December 21) "Fall Like Rain" ~Eric Clapton
Your Most Likeable Trait: OPTIMISM  

What's there to say? You think you are perfect and everyone is flawed. Kidding, but you really do have a hard time improving yourself because you are too busy noticing how others suck. Sometimes. You are a boss of some kind. Business is your calling in the sense that either you run your own or 'take care of business' in some aspect. You are in charge, but sometimes you have to shut up and take a back seat. People will respect you more for simply being the pleasant, fun, exciting Sag you can be. You have a lot of desired passion and when placed properly this passion can do wonderful things. Don't let the rain take from the adventure you could be engaged in because you don't like to be bored and staying home too long never suited you well. You need work and play in any weather. 

         
Virgo (August 23-September 22):  Right as Rain ~ Adele.
Your Most Likeable Trait: CONSCIENTIOUSNESS
 You emo bastard! Hopefully the rain isn't getting the best of you and your moods, but it likely is. Hopefully you haven't retired to the basement, watching Sports Net, or having a Dexter marathon with your phone on silent. Virgo will push everyone and everything away if conflicted or in a bad position emotionally. No one is good enough. Don't let the winds take away from you or your ability to perform because you are on a weird lucky streak and could win big here if smart.You are a really hard worker, and though it might take a few tries to get your engines going (might be prone to visually stimulating distractions) -  but -once you do - you won't be disappointed. You are right a lot of the time - but not always - so keep with your ability to see the grey matters of others - work on your kindness and sensitivity -its a good suite for you - and you know how much you love dressing up in a nice suite ;)

Leo (July 23-August 22): "I Wish It Would Rain Down" ~Genesis 
Your most likeable trait : EXUBERANCE
 Leo, leo, leo. Save the rainy exuberant drama for your mama because nobody cares. Ok. That's not true, people do care, but the ones who truly do - you already know about - and the others, well, they simply seek amusment in your shit. You tend to focus on those who only seek amusement from your antics instead of focusing on those that matter. Mature Leo does do this however - so don't worry, in time, little Leo, you too will be able to focus on the people that truly want you to shine. The only way to get up and get on from anything here is to brush it off or deal with it privately. You know Leo still needs the ego stroke even after bruised, but not not everyone is going to give you this. Leo will hide in work or keep busy to deal with what's really bugging them. You have so much heart and passion, the moment you put this into something you TRULY love (and by you I mean what you love not what your best friend loves) things will start to really click. You of all signs can be a camelian for their partner, conforming to their likes and needs (out of love), but you still need to retain some self regiment. Don't fall into old patterns. You know better.

Libra:(September 23-October 22)"Purple Rain" ~Prince
Your Most Likeable Trait: CHARM
 La-la-la la-la! As frustrating as your lack of opinion can be, you are always the value of entertainment. Even if you annoy people they still want to be around you and they will forgive you just as quickly as you will forgive them. Your 'let's keep the peace' vibe rubs off on people around you - you are pretty fucking impossible to stay mad at. There is a charm and a comfort about your presence that draws people in. Your attraction is paramount lately and its hard to resist. You have a certain, strange, special style that people can't get enough of. You likely hates mornings (or maybe you love them) but of most signs you will be on top this winter season. You will find a sweet temperament in the storm. Don't ask me why. Just a feeling. Libra is constantly trying to find balance and temperament, but something tells me you are on the right path to doing so this month. "Attitude so chill and so breezy."

Taurus (April 20-May 20): Candy Rain ~ Soul 4 Real 
Your Most Likeable Trait :RESPONSIVENESS
Something really small will set you off - or so I am sensing - maybe something already has? You work hard. You work really fucking hard and sometimes you don't feel people understand simple tasks, which you could do in your sleep. You could do a lot of people's jobs better they could. Taurus is best in charge, but sometimes the pressure of being the leader can frustrate Taurus who hates to watch stupid people do a shitty job. Taurus can take a lot, but once charged or feeling physically ill - they will release the truth of their disappointment. On the flip, exciting plans to look forward to, good dinner reservations or a vacation, Christmas shopping etc. will be a great release for Taurus to get back on top. It is easy to help your Taurus girl or guy get over a hump with a simple cheer up involving sex or food or PRESENTS. New clothing items or toys or video games never make Taurus sad either - in fact Taurus will have a mood boost via shopping therapy, and predictably many this month. Merry Christmas TO ME!

Scorpio (October 23-November 21):"Can You Stop the Rain"~ Peabo Bryson 
Your Most Likeable Trait: IDEALISM  

I feel you are still being very dishonest with yourself and your future. There is a lot of repressed feelings, thoughts and concerns which you bury and let surface at the worst times possible. You say you want to work on yourself, well this actually means stopping the ten thousand things you are doing and actually taking the time to work through those things. Scorpio is a total mystery to most people, even if they think they know you, they don't know you that well. Scorpio has a very active mind which travels to unholy places at times (places they do not want to share). Or maybe they do want to share but they don't have the words to do. They want to be positive but they have twisted  internal places, which makes them doubt circumstances, which they shouldn't. Or this makes them over indulge in people and things, which they should doubt but can't lose possession of. You're still mine. Of course there is a happy go lucky in love Scorpio, but even they are holding back their true thoughts. On the flip, they are in fact capable of meeting someone special that they truly, truly trust - almost completely, but it might take some times and a lot of ex partners first.


Aries (March 21- April 19): I Can't Stand The Rain ~ Missy Elliot 
Your Most Likeable Trait: COURAGE
 You are working on becoming a more sympathetic person who doesn't always revert situations back to yourself. You want to be a good person, you really do, you are a good person, right? The hard shell is often misunderstood as bitchy or asshole, but really you just don't always feel comfortable, but you mean well, right? You just don't care to be fake. On the flip there is over socialized Aries who craves validation from a street light, but this is the socially competitive Aries. Even if i don't love you- you should still love me and tell me even if I won't tell you. Aries needs to be true to the self but also needs to think about others. Don't do things because you want something for yourself - try to do something totally selfless and make sure your moves are best for you and the other. Don't be the person you should be just to get into good graces, which benefit you. Hurting others for self gain is just weak game and you know it.

 
Gemini (May 21-June 20): "Blame It On The Rain ~Milli Vanilli  
Your Most Likeable Trait: RESPONSIVENESS
 The rain isn't good for your 'stay at home' side, but let's face it, you won't be down and out for long. Gems really don't like to be alone thaaaaat much, they crave people and excitement. The rain might piss them off because it ruined their outdoor excursion, their hair gets frizzy in the rain or they don't want to ruin their new blazer, but this won't necessarily stop them from doing things. In fact, this is the sign most likely to plan shit and push people out of their funks to do stuff. They will motivate you even if they have little motivation within, and no they don't want to talk about it. Mind you this is a psychological tactic for Gemini because the busier they are the less they have to deal with what might be bothering them. Gemini is very intelligent, very complex in mind, and even if extorted and chatty, they are socially smart (very prone to detail and appearances) so they will repress  - even though should deal - the sloppy subconscious emotions will only come out when sloshed.

Cancer (June 21-July 22): "November Rain"~  Guns n' Roses. 
Your Most Likeable Trait: LOYALTY
 The rain will not be good for Cancer's moody side. Cancer needs to be stimulated by their environment and seeing ugly outside makes them want to do ugly things. It makes them want to sleep eternally. The November rain could bring out your domestic side, a lot of cooking, Christmas crafting, possibly making your own wrapping paper? Who knows. Comfy, cozy, at home Cancer will get just that. Completely cocooned into something. Mind you, Cancer will want times with loved ones and friends, but will either be really out for a good time or really down to stay in. Remember as a Cancer you have the ability to bring people together. Use your loyalty in a good way and things will come together nicely. 2011 is going to be a really exciting year for you- full of exciting changes, high times or special events so stay focused on good things to come. You know you don't like to be too stationary for too long, you'll want to change something, even if you change it back, you'll want to change something. 

Capricorn (December 22-January 19): The Rain Song ~ Led Zeppelin  

Your most likeable trait: STEADINESS
You can't please everyone so you might as well stop trying. You need the validation of knowing your work is well done. You want to take pride in your work at all times, but don't fish for this. People can see through your act of needing to be the best, but yet still you're feeling somewhat inadequate? Others will not give you this sense of self completion. You must find it on your own.  You are constantly asking yourself if you are enough and worry about the things you value - you do need to find a way to break from this. People will start to find you very dull if you can't find a release from the grind. You are decisive, but it wouldn't kill you to be a bit more sporadic. Who are we kidding though? This isn't really possible for you. Dance in the rain if you can :D 
                 


Just remember - like the rain - this too shall pass, and potential rainbows to follow. You just have to be patient. Time doesn't work for anybody but itself. So demand less and be grateful for more. Your not as deprived as you think.  Try to focus on those things and in the mean time, wait on the rainbow that is bound to come - you just have to be a bit patient and perhaps a bit corny too!

Dontate $$$ for Movember : http://ca.movember.com/     

                                             

Nice To Mo Ya'

   Who Not to Date: According to the Zodiac...

The Cautionary Couples

Pisces (Feb 19- March 20) meets Gemini (May 21- June 21): Pisces and Gemini will be attracted to each other's chatty, friendly, fun and flirtation personalities. They will have loads to talk about when they are together, and endless amounts of fun, but does this go beyond the surface? This attraction however, will only be of  either a mental or physical capacity. In most cases, "just friends" because emotionally these two do not click or understand one another. Pisces needs a certain amount of validation, which Gemini is too busy and ADD to provide. Pisces doesn't respond well to the plan and organized chaos that a Gem will bring to the table. Geminis don't have time to waste hashing out the old. They'd much rather be onto the new and demand a partner who is emotionally flexible enough to meet their bipolar needs. 'Great friends' is the likely outcome for these two, but there won't likely be much more long term.

• More likely to work with a Pisces boy and a Gemini Girl
• More likely to work with a Taurus/Gemini cups and Pisces 

Sag (November 21- December 22) meets Taurus (April 20- May 20): These two will be great at pretending they are interested in each other. There is potential of them being good drinking buddies. They might even make a go at it and for a while, but eventually they will combat. On any matter, which doesn't involve having a good time, these two will combat. Taurus can't stand Sag's need to brag constantly and be boastful. Taurus is a advocate of modest pride.Taurus likes stuff and Sag is cheap which is an instant conflict of interest because Sag will never understand the bull's need to shop - or even worse Taurus's desire to never wear the same thing twice. Sag is the master of rocking the same tee ten different ways. Sag wants control but Taurus is the king of controlling and will not settle for anything other than the last word. Sag will want adventure and fun while Taurus will want stay at home couch time avec mac and cheese. They will want to sip wine with a Snuggie, while Sag will crave to get out on the town.  These two signs have very different definitions of the word "adventure."

• More likely to work with a Taurus man and Sag woman 
• More likely to work with a Aries/Taurus Woman and a Sag Man
• More likely to work with a Taurus Woman and a Sag/Capricorn Man

Capricorn (December 22-Jan 20) meets Leo (July 23-Aug 22): These two will understand one another on the home front. Both desiring the homely comforts of love you can rely on. However, Capricorn will serve to be too boring for the lion who, by nature craves excitement. Capricorn does not have time for Leo's drama. They prefer a simple, peaceful union based on success. Leo will want to flaunt success and spend money. While Capricorn would rather maintain a modest front and save earnings responsibility. This pair won't measure up mentally or physically. In the long run, Capricorn is better suited for a person of the simple pleasures, which isn't enough for Leo. Leo wants to roam the jungle and dance in the light, while Capricorn wants to cuddle up with a water and a puzzle. 

• More likely to work with a Leo male and Capricorn woman
• More likely to work with a Sag/Capricorn cusp and Leo 

Cancer (June 22-July 21) meets Aquarius (January 20-Feburary 19) : This has the ability to last and for a very long time because these signs manage to make each other laugh, and balance each other out in a great way. Cancer is more plan orientated and Aquarius more free spirited, which means if AQ loves Cancer enough - they will go along with Cancer's call. This will continue until Cancer begins to bore, and Aquarius feels inadequate. Cancer can't keep with AQ's worldly nature. Cancer gets sprung on simple pleasure likes drinking beer all night at a beer pong tournament or playing darts. AQ would rather  stimulate on a deeper level by being exposed to something new and cultured. They love to have fun but, they also like to exercise their IQ ( Cancer more inclined to laughing and telling jokes than real talk). Surprise, Surprise Cancer is the kind of Crab to bring the AQ out of their airy haze and into an emotional position. However, this won't be matched because Cancer doesn't connect to distant AQ whole heartily. Cancer needs AQ to be naturally emotional because even once AQ is out of the haze - it's won't be enough to satisfy the emotional appetite of both of them. 

• More likely to work with an Aquarius Male and Cancer Woman (no cusps)
• This pairing can work especially if Aquarius Male is on the cusp of Pisces
• Pisces and Cancers understand each other naturally as water signs   
   Cancer (June 22-July 21) meets Aries (March 20-April 20): This will be good at first and has the potential to drag out. Both Cancer and Aries hide behind a shell, which protects them emotionally and will result in stubborn interactions. These signs will clash greatly because Cancer's shell is not as tough as Aries. Cancer will long for emotional comforts and romantic vocations of love, which Aries will not provide. Aries is selfish and therefore expects you to roll out the romantic red carpet, but Cancer can't do this properly without the heads up from Aries. Both signs will enjoy laughter and sensuality but will differ in their extracurricular activities. Aries will bore of the home life and long to make new friends in a public setting. While Cancer will want to Watch Conan O'Brian reruns and pet his cat. Aries will grow tired of Cancer's crabby moods just as Cancer will bitch about Aries selfish, emotionless regiment of work and play. Cancer will judge Aries and this won't fly. Aries has a hard enough time opening up that at the moment of infliction they will be gone. Opening up and coming back with nothing, or feeling like they've "lost" will only anger the ram. They don't like to feel that they've wasted their time. This only leaves them left to roam the street and find immediate attention on the lip's of another. 

• This combo is fire and water -these elements often put each other out 
• This will work better if Aries is on the Cusp of Pisces or if Cancer is on the cusp of Leo

Libra(September 23-October 23) meets Aries (March 21-April 19): There is a strong attraction here because Libra is so passive and Aries is so powerful. They will both love to play, but Aries schedules a time and place for this while Libra will play, play, play, all day. Despite any sex connection this won't be enough to make this work long term. Libra doesn't want to decide and Aries lives to make decisions. Libra can't commit to things and answer questions Aries needed to know the answers to yesterday. These two are also far better off as friends because a true Aries could never date a flake. Libra wants independence, but Aries wants someone strong to rely on, especially since committing (to anyone) is hard enough for an Aries. When they do this they expect a level of security. Libra will leave room for far too much questioning and Aries will then doubt them, which is why this paring is difficult, and unlikely to work. 

The Dark Horses

(Oppsite signs either repel or attract)

Virgo (Aug 23-September 22) meets Pisces (Feb 19-March 22): There is a lot of potential for this to work if Virgo and Pisces are on the same page with what they desire from a relationship. The sexual connection will be magnetic, full of compatible passion, which will make it easy to ignore the emotional problems. Pisces needs validation, especially in situation where Pisces feels insecure, yet Virgo doesn't offer up kudos to anyone. Virgo won't compliment you until they mean it, and at times fragile Pisces, needs instant flattery and terms of endearment. These two will be great in offering one another with an oppositional view point of life. Perhaps Virgo can become more giving and sweet, and Pisces can learn to be more self-involved and less emotionally charged, but neither will ever change too much. Pisces will make allowances, but Virgo won't even acknowledge them. Virgo might just expect these allowances and then punish Pisces when they fails to meet Virgo's control. Many astrology books will deem this a good match, but its hit or miss - this pairing is truly a gamble. A web, which both can be entangled in for a long time. 

• More likely to work with a Pisces female and Virgo Man 
• There are many happy and lasting Pisces/Virgo matches  
• The key to making this work is finding a balance between the physical, mental and emotional connection.

  Taurus (April 20-May 20) meets Scorpio (October 23-November 21): Like Virgo and Pisces these two opposites thrive on their natural chemical and sexual attraction, which stems from their difference. These differences highlight the animalistic attraction, which often occurs here. Mind blowing sex. A weird non-verbal understanding. A secret fetish, which only they share. The sky is the limit. This being said, the pairing will cause for many difficulties, resulting in the drastic change of one partner because the reality of their differences cannot conjoin harmoniously by nature. Scorpio is set in their ways (fixed sign) and so is Taurus (fixed sign) therefore their stubborn heads butt. They will have epic battles and often disagree with each other's approach to things. Either these oppositions will break them or keep them strong over time because like Virgo and Pisces they will get off on their opposition. This is easily used as a catalyst for sex. Regardless this will be a tricky web to free from.

Aquarius (January 20-February 18) meets Leo (July 23-Aug 22): These two opposites are drawn to each other at first. Leo has an energy, which quirky Aquarius finds daunting. Love making may be deep and full of feeling because both is possessed by contrasting energies, which attract strongly. The connection of opposition between these two signs, however, starts to dwindle as Aquarius is a highly mental sign in need of constant brain stimulation.  Leo is powered my mental stimulation but, they also need lots of physical attention and affection. AQ and Leo will be drawn to each other because they both need to shine and love to do so, but their desire for this is expressed in very different natures. Neither can provide this limelight for the other because the water-carrier is interested in the world at large. Everybody. They are anybody's biggest supporter. Leo appreciates this, but only wants AQ to support LEO. Leo needs the narcissistic attention which aloof Aquarius will never give. AQ needs to exert his/her energy in a lot of different realms.

Remember none of this is written in stone. Any of these pairings could work especially if one or the other has a birthday that falls on the cusp of another star sign. There are plenty more potential, hypothetically bad birthday combos and over time I will post more, but if you have one pairing, which you are curious about specifically ask me! Either on my blog directly or email me here - ask_me@homail.ca

* For a more detailed definition of a Dark Horse visit this old blog post: http://whatsyourbirthday.blogspot.com/2010/08/dont-date-him.html

Movemberscopes

MOVEMBER

                                            MOVEMBER

MOVEMBER

So the time has come, once again, for our men to get mo hairy,  mo itchy and mo competitive in order to raise money and awareness for Prostate Cancer. Gents will battle it out with their fellow 'mo bros' to see who can grow the most stellar stash and raise the most cash. Worry not, young lads who know (from current or ex-girlfriends) that they "look better" clean shaven. Any madame worth loving will support her stash-growing creature especially during this occasion. Yes, she is allowed to celebrate after the 30 days are up, but hopefully you both will be celebrating in the amount of pledges recieved. Last year Movember was unforgettably epic, so let's try to double it in size. Even if that means seeing some seriously dirty Schancez stashes because even I (hater of hair) can handle it if its for a good cause. Please check out the following link to learn more on how you can support our fellow
Vancouver teams raising money this Movember season. http://ca.movember.com/mospace/91695/

 
Additional Video regarding Movember Canada:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8FDm_ApS6o&feature=player_embedded#!

Movember (and hopefully in 5 years this will be the official name for the month of November) is an exciting, but also strange time. Movember events, hair growing competitions and wrap-up parties will surely help to add flavor to this month (look out for hilarious blogs of boys documenting their growth and plenty of online jokes to commence.) On the astrological front, this winter month it is a little dry. A retrospective time of pensiveness. For some, a time to buy Christmas  presents (and get excited for this or an upcoming holiday), for others a time to study and hermit, and of course a time for single people to feel really, cold (literally) and lonely (emotionally). You might see some acts of desperation this month as people who are settled in are quite cozy, and those who aren't are a bit stir crazy trying to find satisfying, distractible leisure.

Aquarius(Janurary 20-Feburary 18):


Best Case Scenario : You're flying. You feel like you've got your step back (some of you will call this swag) and you like the things that life is showing you. You might consider career, just to ensure you are in a place that a) it still make you happy and b)  that there is still room for you to grow. Love and life is starting a new chapter. Your tens times the person you were this time last year, even if you don't know it.

Worst Case Scenario: Your getting sloppy.  You'll be doing a lot of shit and likely not feeling very badly about it, but it will set it in, in a grand way, one day soon. Don't isolate yourself because you're afraid to ask others to be there for you - that's what a friendship is for. You don't always have to conceal your emotions or try to cover them up with new endeavors. Deal then peruse.

Aquarius Stash Style: The Anything Go Mo

Gemini:(May 21-June 21)

Best Case Scenario: You feel really good about yourself. Probably because you want to start making sure your being healthy again, and being good to yourself in every way possible. You realize its time to make 'you' a number one priority. You love new projects and plans so if your back to where you want to be this should flow nicely and successfully. People will thank you for the great party because yeah, it really was great. And you were responsible for it. You will be the guy or girl to make the most of their Movember.

Worst Case Scenario: You get a little too bogged down by the winter blues and find yourself with a bottle of Merlot on a Sunday night, snuggled with a blanket watching TV re-runs. This won't last for long, as Gemini is the best at picking up their chin and moving forward, however, if conflicted this month, Gems will face emotional battles, which they doesn't have any desire to fight. Deep emotions are just a bother to Gemini - they don't have time to feel pointless crap. Good thing Gem is a super thinker and can push out of it!

                                                 Gemini Stash Style : The Perfect Stash

Libra: (September 23-October 23)


Best Case Scenario: Lots of laughter and possible travel (I hate when horoscopes say that and I am never going anywhere) so by 'travel'  I mean you might just be literally be 'on the go'. New flirtations will arise. A possible new favorite shirt or dress might enter your closet. Your not trying to live within too many limitations and this has always suited you well. Your surrounded by the best of the best: good people, fun invitations and endless excitement. You feel like a regular "it" person.

Worst Case Scenario: You start to change your position drastically from what you were feeling in months prior. You are a moment to moment person but if conflicted this might take an impulsive change, which won't be admired by loved ones. Everyone always wants you to be happy, charming and fun but the pressure of that can be exhausting at times. Sometimes you just want to be with no one.

                                                  Libra Stash Style : The Silly Stash

Leo: ( July 23-Aug 22)

Best case scenario: You have let go a lot of things that used to bother you (or were still bothering you, but no one knew) and found a inner peace, which doesn't make you feel like you need to prove yourself to anyone. Your happy and you will find ways to itch those scratches of boredom, which might taunt a Leo, but you've grown a lot. Maybe what or who you used to think you needed you now realize that you don't, and it feels good.


Worst Case Scenario: Your letting your ego get the best of you. Either making yourself feel like shit for noting because you don't feel ' good enough' in your own eyes. Or working so hard you haven't really been able to enjoy life. Your not really sure what you enjoy anymore. Though, you do, you're just getting into this 'whatever' zone where you have to focus yourself back onto your talents and passions. Utilize your strengths. You have many.

Leo Stash Style : The Flamboy' Mo

Pisces: (Feburary 19-March 20)

Best Cast Scenario: Your not letting trivial stuff get you down. You learning to relax and let things go. You're actually able to accomplish something and not just last minute. You've gained a strange confidence lately or a new sense of self worth. Your not going to put up with what you might have in the past. You are learning to see yourself the way others do because if you didn't - you might not think much of yourself and you should. Keep with this positive attitude. People and potential suitors will be drawn to you.

Worst Case Scenario: You let the weather put you in a mood, which only you seem to understand. Everyone else just thinks your being weird. Don't personalize everything. Its great you want to help but if its has nothing to do with you people are just going to think your odd for getting emotionally involved. Train your heart to pick the places it should be - and that shouldn't be everywhere. Finding work that satisfies, pays or sustains will be challenging and frustrating.

                                                  Pisces Stash Style: The Pensive Mo

   


Cancer: (June 21-July22)

Best Case Scenario: You've got high times in your life, either coming up or past, which are swimming in your mind. Either you just met someone or have a little crush, but either way your feeling pretty good about yourself and your charm. Your letting yourself find a sense of enjoyment in any situation and remaining calm while doing so. Your great in a crisis these days and an excellent multi-tasker. You will make the most out of any month.


Worst Case Scenario: You start to cave in the Cancer shell for reclusive, self time. Really you've just lost your mojo to party, which is rare for you. Your not as up to make the efforts. More inclined for comforts you can trust. You also aren't finding things as funny as you used to. TV sucks. Your bored at work. You need to surround yourself with people who make you giddy and get you out of the rut.

                                                    Cancer Stash Style: The Funny Mo


Scorpio :(October 24- November 21)

Best Case Scenario : You starting to feel a sense of happy, sexy, independence, which has been missing from your life for a while. You feel stable and can a see a blurry future of where you are headed. You've been wanting a blueprint for something or someone and now you might be able to see more clearly. Answers are coming to questions youve been asking for far too long. Even if the answers aren't what you want to hear, don't let this mess with the momentum you've recently built for yourself.


Worst Case Scenario: You too fall into the winter madness of really bad days, and then OK days, and then no-so-good days. You become an unpredictable person because your feelings are changing too much. If you've been in a good mood lately keep it, but keep it mind that tact is worth a lot more than shrill. When conflicted Scorpio wants to claw out, well put some mittens on and chill. You often think you can block stuff or people out and that you don't have any needs, but everyone needs.If you start to have a more functional, conventional relationship with others, you might not feel so strange when you suddenly need to reach out. Don't fear people - fear yourself - you are the only person preventing you from having what you want or need.

                                                     Scorpio Stash Style: The Sexy Stash


Sagittarius: (November 21-December 22)


Best Case Scenario: Your high score in whatever sport you play, awesome at the office, claiming new rewards and reeling in all kinds of deals. You feel elated because you and yourself have done some really wonderful things these days. Your working hard and the pressure you've been putting on yourself is paying off. You feel like you are on the right path in more than one avenue of your life.

Worst Case Scenario: Your feeling like a bit of a jerk because as a Sag you hate to lose or miss out and this in turn dictates their whole mood. Even if your Canucks lose your suddenly in the most unbearable mood.You've been boggled down with sickness either of the mind or the heart, and again this pisses you off because you don't like anything or anyone slowing you down. You're getting tired of keeping secrets, but aren't ready to give up the ultra special, extra private relationship, which you have with yourself.

Sag Stash Style : The All-Man Mo

                                                        




Virgo: (August 23-September 22)


Best Case Scenario: You've finally gotten over your shy bump and can moderately say how you feel. You're taking more chances, maybe raising your hand in class more or finally found the courage to ask "that girl/guy" out. You have a new found sense of confidence, in which, for a moment, your not secretly self criticizing yourself. This in turn brings upon more attention, and there is nothing more that a Virgo likes then attention. Even if he or she might be too coy at times to ask for it.

Worst Case Scenario: You put off everything and anything that asks you to face a consequence. You think this is smart, that it is benefiting you, but its keeping you back from developing into a mature human being. You don't want to answer to anybody, but at the same time you don't truly want to hurt anyone. There are certain people, few people who you actually care what they think. If Virgo finds that they have let down these people, it will be hard for Virgo to persist through. Therefore Virgo should be extra careful this month. Don't use people as a punching bag for your moods and frustrations. Instead, let others help you. Trusting just one person might prove to be very powerful.

 

Virgo Stash Style : The Smart Stash

Capricorn: (December 22-Janurary 20)

Best Case Scenario: You will feel a sense of contentment within your life. Either you are excited about something new that is happening or you will be considering a calculated change. A best case for a Capricorn is having nothing to complain about, killing it in the office/kitchen and still finding time for homely comforts. Capricorn will feel at ease if they know that they have people to support their simple desires. People who accept them just as is.

Worst Case Scenario: You aren't being as true to yourself as you think. You're constantly second guessing yourself and end up writing off things before you even get a chance to experience them. On the other hand, your all over the map with your thoughts. Figure out what it is you want, but accept it if you can't get it and don't try to be something your not just to impress another person. Your true self will always shine through even if you think your not being yourself.

                                               Capricorn Stash Style: The Serious Stash

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Best Case Scenario: The 'love' in your life is serving as an excellent comfort. Those away from loved ones are missing the bodily comfort, but are able to appease loneliness with nostalgic reminiscing. Aries will be good if they are on top at work and play with room to take care of their demanding self needs. This means time to make it to the gym, time for fun or even time to catch up with friends. Aries will shine if they accept the good and stop asking for more or searching for better.

Worst Case Scenario: Satisfaction won't come easily to the conflicted stubborn headed ram. Loose ends will drive the ram crazy and out control. Instead of tears you will see anger and possible spazzing. Aries won't be able to communicate their feelings and will become tortured by their unique form of self denial. This will push loved ones away because they will not understand what is happening. Don't keep people in the dark. You will be surprised how far being honest with yourself will take you.

                                            Aries Stash Style:  The Curly Mo Courage


Taurus: (April 20-May 20)


Best Case Scenario: The bull is the most materialistic sign in the zodiac, so many will feel glee shopping and getting prepared for one of their favorite holidays. Taurus loves to find great gifts that are just perfect for the receiving party. They will sip their favorite holiday drinks and enjoy good food, good friends, good wine and good laugh. A holiday Taurus heaven. There will be gifts coming soon too. This makes Taurus happy.


Worst Case Scenario: Change still hasn't come. Taurus is slow to make moves but craves to make them desperately. Finding the courage to do this will be hard because Taurus is so hard pressed into stable routine and regularity. Love will be steady or stubborn depending on the situation, but Taurus will have to learn to vocalize their concerns more if they wants something to change in either work, love or play. Financially poor Taurus will hate this time because they won't be able to participate to their full potential.

Taurus Stash Style: The Stubborn Stash

I hope everyone will pledge our Movember men to help raise money for Prostate Cancer.  I feel these are the most effective forms of fund-raising because they bring people together in a good way for a good cause. Good memories and good times. Best of luck out there boys!

Horror Signs For Her

                                       My Favorite Virgo Rapper, Nas on the Female Star Signs:
                                          THE VIDEO FOR THIS http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXNUR_GoQrI&feature=related

Girl what's your astrology, Virgo?

If so, you the same sign as me

Gemini's are fly, the kind I need

Love Aquarius and Pisces

Can't leave a Libra

I live life day to day

Let a playa play

Supportin' my women

All my Capricorns and Scorpio women

Leo's and Cancer, girls be bad

Only sign I can't deal with is Sag

Confusin' my enemies

Never losin, clever movement

Act smooth where the women be

Amused by my energy

When they choose me

I just tell 'em the music's my remedy

I just swell 'em and leave 'em swolled

And girl this is somethin' that you need to know - NAS

 

As requested, below are the horrorscopes for females signs. Please remember this is all in sheer fun. It is an exaggerated portrayal of how a "scary" case of a woman might appear under their particular sign if conflicted,  but by no means are these accounts remotely accurate or meant to offend anyone. This is solely in the spirit of Halloween and comical amusement. If you are a CUSPER read both:

  Aries/Taurus:  April 14 to April 23
 

Taurus/Gemini:  may 15 to may 25

Gemini/Cancer:  June 16 to June 26

Cancer/Leo:  July 17 to July 27

Leo/Virgo:  Aug. 18 to Aug. 27

Virgo/Libra:  Sept. 17 to Sept. 27

Libra/Scorpio:  Oct. 18 to Oct. 28

Scorpio/Sagittarius:  Nov. 17 to Nov. 27

Sagittarius/Capricorn:  Dec. 17 to Dec. 27

Capricorn/Aquarius:  Jan. 14 to Jan. 24

Aquarius/Pisces:  Feb. 13 to Feb. 23

Pisces/Aries:  Mar. 15 to Mar. 25

LEO(July 23- August 22) This Chic is just a little too into herself -if you know what I mean. An open narcissist, meaning she does not shy from letting you know that she IS into her own shit. For example, she doesn't want to talk about you. She would rather talk about her new profile picture. While your having dinner, she isn't looking you in the eyes because she is updating her status, maybe even saying "she's just about to have dinner @ The Keg. Nom. Nom. Nom." She has fans. She must alert them. Leo girl has a heart, but if 'horrible' she won't be able to see beyond her own reflection. She will get lost in herself. She is that girl that messages your EX or starts a roaring fight because she doesn't like her throne being threatened. She has to have one up. She is greedy and wants full control of the limelight. As a lover, she will be dramatic, highly emotional and spastic. She will create drama over nothing simply because she is bored. She'll cheat. She will be a flirt and be an attention whore, possibly dragging you places that you really don't want to be in the first place. Likely because she just had to "show her face". She probably just got her hair done or something vain. (Leo will also hate me for this post because it not a form of flattery, something every Leo can't get enough of.)

SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 21): She is maybe the cheapest woman on the planet. She counts every penny, and if she knows she can get some sort of 'deal' she'll be in there like a dirty shirt on Tuesday. This becomes annoying in a relationship because nothing is experienced without an entourage of authority. Let's talk about how much we spent aka let me yell at you for spending too much (but yet she can spend whatever she wants secretly). She is little-miss-know-it-all and what she says flies. Her ears are entirely deaf to the oppositional voice, she would much rather be in charge. She tells you nothing of what she is really feeling or thinking. Everything emotional about her is kept private. She doesn't like to lose EVER. Her need to win will piss the shirt off anybody at least once. Gambling addict, race track lover, or board game junkie - this woman loves to play a little too much. To make matters worse she will boast afterwards and rub all her success in your face. She's not willing to share either. She'd much rather things be her way so if you're interested in taking a back seat - hop on, or hop out because she's going with or without you.

PISCES: (February 19 - March 20) She's a moody bitch that's for sure. One minute sweet as sugar, but then suddenly she will rear an ugly fish-head of disaster. A mood unmatched. You will get nervous before saying hello, wondering what kind of greeting you will get. Emotions run high, when it's good, it's really good, but when it's bad it's really bad. She's sneaky. She snoops. She's the type to go through your phone, your computer, your drawers. She will look for anything to prove you can't be trusted because secretly she can't allow herself to be involved in anything built upon real trust. She prefers to enable, and will enable the weak, make excuses for both her self and her love interest. She is prone to abusive relationships. She will not motivate you to change your junkie, alcoholic ways, instead she holds your cigarette while you take a swig. Way too accommodating, the shitty Pisces gets passed around like a bad habit. She'll never find romance unless she starts to set limitations. Bad Pisces makes great rules but always breaks them. A true addict always calls home for money, but if your dating her, well, she might just steal it from you.

CANCER (June 22-July 22) Cancer chicks are complicated. Either they are too fucking emotional or too fucking inclined to hide behind their humor. Either they are miserable or too happy that you are led to question it. If she's "crazy for or you' like Hart, she will be the clingy type - she might run your show. Wondering why you haven't moved in yet? Wanting to spend every second with you, sending you annoying texts and insisting on staying in and watching TV. She's moody and crabby and can be really erratic and cruel when charged. She is also two-faced, saying one thing to your face but then another behind your back. You will likely feel as though you can never truly understand the confused, aloof shell, which she conceals herself in. You know the evil she is capable of.The worst part of this chic is at times she will try to be like a dude (because she surrounds herself with dudes), sending you short messages, acting like she doesn't care and frowning at proclaims of sappy love. It's a facade, really she just need the male attention a bit more than most and would rather double dip while she can then ever admit otherwise. She just relates better to men, sure. Next time she says this poll how many of those same men she has slept with, I bet its more than two.

TAURUS: (April 20-May 20) She's wants to be the bitch with the most cake. Meaning that if cake was the coolest thing to buy, she'd have a whole fridge full. This princess wants the best of the best and yet she always wants more. She might be good with money, but she also loves to spend it, and if you have it and are willing to give it she can't really decline. Materialistic crack. Though very independent and hard-working Taurus girl likes to be pampered and might turn a raised eyebrow to stuff like camping or 'roughing it' etc. They need their STUFF. She'd rather stay at the Ritz. Very stubborn and very jealous when shitty, the bull girl will also take you down with one blow. Don't mess. She's got the bark, and if you push her hard enough she will roar back. The kind of chic who if you hit her, she's going to hit you back and it might just be a mightier punch than you've got it. There's no way you're in control if your dating this type of Taurus. She has final say. She's fucking stubborn. She'll complain all the time about how she's overworked, or how her thighs are getting fat and then ask you, more than you like if she looks fat. This will annoy you because you really do love her the way she is, right? She loves food so, so, so, much but won't allow herself to enjoy it because she feels guilty after.  She might have some serious scars from her past life battles (and I mean literal scars upon flesh). She's tough. She will cut you and if you are a weak sign she will own you. Total control. Even if you don't know it, you'll still be owned. 

GEMINI: (May 21-June 21) Gossip one day- please another. Gemini is symbolized by the twins, and in a negative case she becomes so dually-natured that she is genuine in her twin switch offs. She might not even remember shit talking you last because when her good girlfriend face is forward, she sincerely is trying to be good again. The bad Gemini however, will be a total mess and will not even be slightly aware of it. She's perfect. She will party, plan, jaunt, sex, play, pine - anything to get away from the mundane. Anything to get away with retrospective alone time. Party. Party. Party. Crash. Party. Gems don't dwell. They have very short attention spans. They are the master of the quick"K I GTG" phone call.  Even if she was dwelling you wouldn't know it. She'll be perfectly put together in a stunning dress, ready to mingle - even if she is secretly tortured inside. She won't compromise herself socially so don't try to embarrass her, she will be embarrassed and she will tell you. Don't step on her fancy shoe covered toes either. She'll need affection and attention so much she might seek it in a desperate fashion or find other people to please her when you don't provide. Be prepared to provide. Be prepared for what -the-fucking-ever.

ARIES: (March 21-April 19) This woman is out of control with being in control.  Like Lady GAGA (Pisces/Aries cusp) "she's a free bitch." She's bossy, assertively annoying and impatient. So impatient that if you just got to a nightclub and there is a mild line she will insist on leaving immediately. Or go bark at the bouncer about how important she is, and shouldn't she be in there? She'll make a scene. She'll get angry and YELL. She'll be self-protective to a fault. You will say I love you, and she won't. She's cold a hearted snake because she doesn't want to subject herself to any kind of real pain. She wouldn't voluntarily put herself through that.  She might be your "really busy bitch friend" that doesn't ever have relationships because she's simply too into her power agenda. How to be the best, how to outsurvive the best, and always take home first prize. #2 is not good enough here, you can always be better, which means you will NEVER appease this kind of Aries in love.
Aries women are often great career women with a natural ability to break the glass ceiling and rise to the top, however, some men find this very intimidating. She wants to be the boss, but so do you, and if that's the case, this isn't the right fit. She will however do the same in a love situation, if she wants it she will take it, she doesn't care who was there before her, if she really wants something and sees it rightfully as hers, she will claim it. Bad Aries is like a stranger sleeping in your bed, you think you know them, but you never really will. You will never be loved more than she loves herself. It's survival of the fittest and "she's fit, but she knows it."If conflicted, she will always chose herself.

AQUARIUS:  (January 20- February 18)She doesn't know what she wants and therefore she gives EVERYTHING a chance. Literally, she might have flirted up your fat cousin and provided the sweet thing with false hope because she was bored. Nothing is ever emotionally enough for her to invest in so therefore she pines in planned adventure, which still doesn't quench her thirsting, water-carrying lips. She's got a mean side. Sunny until flipped over and then her wrath will be released. Don't mess. Bad Aquarius is just as tough as bad Taurus, (which is really why these two are likely to combat.) She is not always going to say nice things about you behind your back. In fact, some shitty Aquarius women meddle in other people's crap just to stir the pot. They enjoy gossip even if they say they don't.  They secretly enjoying seeing other people fail, mainly if they didn't like the person to begin with. She either hates you or can just bloody stand you. Therefore the 'he said/she sad' does appeal to her, but as always, Aquarius retains a sense of nonchalance. She retains an element of supreme weirdness. She loves men and men love her but she doesn't know how to limit herself nor does she know how to commit. She's never going to let anyone tell her what she can and cannot do. If a better, bigger, brighter adventure were to dangle itself in front of her pretty eyes, she would not be able to say no. She can't help that's she an eternal drifter. You can try to catch her but, she will keep running.

SCORPIO: (Oct 24-November 21) She's got some numbers missing upstairs. Her mind is like a war zone of thoughts that only she can keep. She's not ever completely honest with you because she's never completely honest with herself. She doesn't want to reveal all her card to anybody. In truth, even to herself. She just doesn't trust people enough, but perhaps she just doesn't trust herself? She's highly self conscious and it's overtly apparent. She's afraid to ever truly express herself (or her level of love and devotion) because she fears the worst possible outcome. Always. She's not the girl who sees life in rainbow lights, she sees shit in jade. She will reign on her own parade because she doesn't necessarily think everyone or anyone can have it all. Ever. What's happiness? Something nobody should invest in. She's willing to settle for what she has even if she is capable of so much more (remember this is only the shitty Scorpio - good Scorpio is very career orientated.)
She has a shady past or has done shady shit in the present, but she's so great at keeping secrets you'll never know about it. You won't even suspect it. Even if she spent time in jail. She uses sex like a weapon, A very, very, deadly weapon.

CAPRICORN: (December 22 -January 19) She'll think she can do everything that you can do better. You will be able to feel the snob oozing off her plastic smile. She does not understand otherwise.  No. She will look down on you. She'll work like its her life. She'll stick to a routine of life that leaves no room for excitement or spice. Her love is cold and calculated. She doesn't surpass an inch on anything, but has a certain idea of how things should be. Her own personal bar, which everything has to be measured up against. She knows better. She won't be afraid to tell you. Her code of conduct is how she feels things should be at all times. She dictates and you listen. She's fussy and will nit-pick you. She will nag you. She will think everything has to be done 'juuust right' and hearing her say those exact words will make you sick in your mouth a little bit. You will start to feel like you can do nothing right. She becomes soo predictable, you actually start to wonder if she is in fact human.

LIBRA: (September 23-October 23)She takes the cake in FLAKE. Nobody "doesn't know" more that this girl. She just doesn't know. You can ask her, yes or no? And she will say, maybe, but really she just doesn't know. She likes you, but she also sort of likes this other guy from her gym and maybe also this friend of her friend's. She's not the best at monogamy. She has waaay too many friends and they don't mean truly anything but she still wants to play with them. Maybe tie them up.  She is the crazy cat lady, constantly bringing over random friends "to crash". "Babe, Is it cool if Zane crashes tonight?" You've never met any of them before but according to her they are like "best of friends." Fine. Sure. She'll be so charming you won't be able to say no to any of this. Eventually her weirdness and overtly flaky, indecisive behavior will start to bother you. You'll start to shy away from her abrasive fashion choices and question the weird, impulsive, fucked up hobbies that she's into hardcore for a week but drops the next. You'll want her attention but she'll be too busy giving it to someone or something else, but as Nas says, "you can't leave a Libra." This bitch casts spells.

VIRGO: (August 23-September 22) She will want to talk about every detail about every thing. She will nag you. Why didn't you clean up? Why didn't you dress nice? why didn't you write her back? She's analytical to a fault in that she weighs out everything all the time. She sees what is wrong with you before she sees what is right. She can only see in black and white (just as she probably only ever wears black and white...sometimes grey). Psychologically, She might entertain the grey area, but her true values stay with black or white and this means that yes she is judging you. She's always right too. Scratch that - she is never wrong. Self-righteous and stubborn she doesn't bow down to the authority of anyone. Virgos hate authority figures. They are better in charge.Crappy Virgo also hates dirty people, really fat people, unfortunate looking people and people who brag too much. They prefer everyone to look attractive and at all times if possible. If you've changed anything about you she will notice because she lives and breathes detail. She is a fucking detective, natural private Nancy Drew, and she will catch you. She will win because why? She has evidence. And yes because she is always right. If you did the crime Virgo girl will catch you in time. Even if you didn't do it, you still will never be 'good enough' for this woman because a bad Virgin is never satisfied. She is seeking perfection, but still isn't likely to find it in you. Thought she will use you, and milk you for all she thinks your worth. Always keeping you right where you she needs you, but never really letting go just in case she needs to come back.




         *Remember these are just in fun and by no means true or meant to be taken seriously.*